The chores aren’t getting done, homework is falling behind. You ask them to start a load of dishes and they are off in another room playing on snapchat. You just don’t know how to get your children to listen to you.
You’ve asked numerous times for these things to get done.
Sometimes it feels like everything you say falls on deaf ears.
I’m here to let you know that you are not alone. Many parents have difficulties communicating with their children. Keep reading “How to get you children to listen” to learn more.
Get thier full attention
If you want to be sure your child is listening to you, be sure to get their full, undivided attention. You also want to give them your full, undivided attention. Hollering orders from across the room is no way to get any one to listen to you.
It helps to sit down with them. Put cell phones away to minimize distractions. Look them in the eyes. Be sincere about what you are telling them. Even if its just to get them to help you with the daily chores.
Listen to them
Your children crave to be heard just as much as you do.
You have to give to get what you want. To be heard, one must first listen. This is very important to remember if you are trying to get your children to listen to you
Give them the respect you want from them. When they are trying to tell you something, give them the attention they need.
I know how it can be easy to get a little carried away some times. As a parent, your emotions might get the best of you. As humans, we want to be heard. If we don’t feel like we are being heard, we yell.
We get loud as a way to force the other person to listen to what you have to say.
Yelling is ineffective and often counterproductive. Yelling at your child can cause them to shy away from you more. They may close up and refuse to tell you anything.
If you want more ideas on how to get through to them with out yelling, read THIS article.
Be stern and follow through
I know I’ve been talking this whole time about being gentle, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be stern. If you say you are going to do something, then do it.
It took me a long time to master this one. I tend to be too soft and a push over. But with time and practice, any one can master anything.
If you say you’re going to take the phone away, then take it away. Empty threats are no better than empty promises. It is important for children to learn that there are consequences for their behavior.
Children that grow up with out consequences, often grow up to be unreliable adults.
Be positive and encouraging
Always encourage good behavior by rewarding good behavior.
The rewards don’t have to be anything extravagant. Something as simple as a sincere “Thank you” can do the trick. Give them a small piece of candy for getting the laundry put away. Reward them with extra TV time.
Be positive when speaking to them. Instead of “GET THAT ROOM CLEAN.” Try saying ” I would appreciate it if you get your room clean.” And (if they do get it done) acknowledge the fact that they actually did it.
Learning to how to communicate with your children isn’t something that will happen over night. Its going to take time. It may not be easy, but trust me, its worth it.
‘Till next time,